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The Art of Balance

Balance

Ever felt overwhelmed from the various whirlwinds of life? At some point, we all have and did not know what to do. For me personally, I gravitate to social media to distract me from the hardships of life but the distraction does not last for long. Over the past year, I have learned how to shy away from the glamour of social media and I turn to God to help me balance the seasonal hardships within my own life. What exactly is balance ? Balance is an even distribution of weight allowing someone/something to remain steady. This can be something as small as meditating and having quiet time alone for ten minutes, going for a walk around the neighborhood, or reading. Temporarily stepping away from whatever is causing you stress by focusing your mind in another space is that breath of fresh air that you need so you won’t break down in the midst of the storm. Balance looks different from person to person, find what works best for you. It’s apart of a bigger process, which is to become the best for of YOU. Nobody else can do it for you, so taking precautions is essential. Society has tried to brainwash us into thinking life is about all work and no play, but that’s the formula for self-destruction. Life is meant to be enjoyed, find the perfect balance between work and play and everything will be okay. ✨

Consistency

This topic has always been one that’s been near to my heart. I used to struggle with trying to be as “perfect” as I can when I quickly came to the realization that consistency is not about perfection. It is more about working to be able to achieve and attain the goals you have set for yourself. Oftentimes, it is easy to quit things once they get hard (or the results are not what you intended), but pushing through the struggle will give you the wear and tear that is needed (mentally, physically, and emotionally). I’m sure we’ve all heard the saying, “Consistency is key,” and that’s very true. Think of it like a 2-layered cake, the first layer is persistence simply because it causes one to be firm in the thing(s) they are working towards. It causes you to dig your heels in and really get to work. It lays the foundation for everything that comes later. The top layer, of course, is consistency because once the routine of being persistent forms, consistency will come easily. Forming healthy habits in the beginning helps you tremendously in the end, especially when adversity arises. For example, I would journal daily when I got home from work. I would make a list of the positive things that happened day to day, when I first started it was a little difficult to think of some things. But, I noticed as I continued to incorporate it into my nightly routine, it became easier and I looked forward to journaling! It is easy to get discouraged along the way, but one thing to always keep in the forefront of your mind is to remember the reason you started in the first place. Think back to how excited you were when you set those goals, that in itself is enough motivation to remember that you ARE an overcomer! Also remember, consistent action creates consistent results.

Having the Right Heart

Throughout our lives, we have constantly been taught that we should keep our hearts in the right place. Having the right heart can save you from heartache, being in bad predicaments, and a number of other things. Life situations can cause your outlook on life and other things to be altered to seeing the negative side of things versus seeing the positive side of things, which is only a down spiraling trick. Pray constantly, evaluate yourself, treat others with kindness, and above all else, keep your heart in the right place. It all starts with being in the right environment, keeping your thoughts clear, surrounding yourself with positive people, and watch the things you discuss because negative talk affects many other areas of your life. Jesus is the perfect example because even though He knew his enemies were going to mistreat Him, He still treated them with respect and did not hold any grudges against them. Even though it can be hard, it is an example that we should all follow because at the end of the day, we will be rewarded for our diligence. It’s a process, but at a time like this, it is a sacrifice we have to make. Happy HumpDay & remember that there’s beauty #InTheMaking

Battles

Battles are obstacles in our lives that we have to face, willingly or forcefully. Recently, we have all have to cohesively face a number of them due to things rapidly changing nationwide. This has been a time of confusion, loss, figuring things out, finding new ways to cope, and a number of other things; but the ending result will be beautiful. Everyone has heard the saying, “God gives his hardest battles to His strongest soldiers,” and being strong is the only option we have at this moment. Make the best of the battles at hand, and the outcome will be what it is supposed to be. For example, I am a college senior and when I came to the realization that the remainder of my senior year will no longer happen as I envisioned it, I was heartbroken. I didn’t get to experience a lot of the things I had planned, and it took me a hot minute to process not being able to say a formal goodbye to some of my friends, go to my last Spring Formal, and a number of other things. I had to come to the realization that this was just God’s plan for the rest of my college experience and it was a hard pill swallow, honestly. But it also caused me to lean on God more than ever before this battle is a lot bigger than little Mia is, and I just have to live life one day at a time. So I want to encourage you to have a positive mindset, catch up on some rest, be productive, finish strong, and make this quarantine the best while we patiently wait on outside to open!

I Choose Me

It’s so easy to get wrapped up in the everyday adventures within our personal lives, but how often are you making sure that you’re okay? It’s cool to check on friends and reach out to others but you should come first because you’re the only YOU. Life situations arise and they cause you to make a decision between choosing yourself or choosing something that may not be the best for you personally, but it’s up to you to make the right decision. It can be something as simple as choosing to hangout with friends KNOWING you have school work to do, but in that moment you have to decide which is more important. Putting myself first is something I am still learning about because I always think about what if someone needs me? I wanna be available to help them, but the truth is, I’ve got to be available for myself and set my priorities in order before I can even attempt to help anyone else. How can I lend a hand when my hand is worn out, bogged down, and not fully functioning? That’s unhealthy, take time to make sure you’re okay because you should come first, not in a selfish way, but you’re the only you that you have. Making these decisions are not easy …. like at all …. but you feel so much better after they’re made because they end up benefiting you in the end. #HappyHumpDay

Regrets

The past made us who we are today, and even though it is unchangeable, we often reflect back on things we wish we could change. Regrets make us feel small, unworthy, foolish, and a number of other negative emotions, but it shouldn’t be that way. They should be something that we learn from, no matter how big or small the mistake was, it is all apart of a bigger picture/process. I used to reflect on the past so much that I wasn’t actively engaging in the present and it caused me to feel unworthy, not good enough, and i became very doubtful of my present capabilities. Once I got a handle on my thought process, I quickly began to realize that I am not the mistakes I once made. Do I still struggle with it at times? Absolutely. But do I now know of a better way to handle those thoughts when they arise? Absolutely. Think positively, look at the good things first versus the bad things. It is scientifically proven that we remember the negative things about ourselves and others before we ever think about the good, but all it takes is making one decision to change your thought process. Yes, some days are harder than others, but don’t let anxiety get the best of you by regretting things you did yesterday, a year ago, or even ten years ago. Live in the now, live life one day at a time, and realize that everything that is meant for you is going to happen. Choose today to stop looking back on things you cannot change, and take control of things you CAN change. 🌻 Happy HumpDay ! And remember to not get discouraged because there’s beauty #InTheMaking 💖

Joy

In today’s time it seems a bit difficult for us to be genuinely happy because life throws so many hardships at us, but the truth is that we should have joy simply because we make it through the hardships. God is our joy and peace and everything comes from Him! Find joy in the small day-to-day things in your life because it could be worse, if the things around you don’t make you happy, then change them. Choose to look at things from a positive perspective versus looking at the negative first, choose to treat people nicely when you don’t really feel like it. The change starts with you and you can bring so much joy and be a light to others simply by making the choice to be happy yourself. Has school gotten overwhelming? Take those assignments in small increments and succeed little by little. That one employee at work getting on your nerves? Smile and be kind to them and go on about your day. God already has everything handled and he just wants us to praise Him in the midst of it all, it is all apart of the process. Be the joy/light you want to see! It won’t happen overnight, but like I always say, you have to start somewhere. Never forget: there is beauty in the making. Happy HumpDay!

R~E~S~T

American culture is centered about being busy to feel “accomplished,” but this is not the case. If anything, excessively working on a task for an extended period of time without a break causes burnout. Rest is often put to the side because there is ALWAYS something that needs to be done. Take 5 minutes, an hour, a day, however much time is needed to recuperate to prevent burnout. It can be as simple as watching Netflix for an hour, going to a coffee shop, going to the gym, whatever you want it to be. Being at rest, by definition, is : “free of anxieties or disturbances.” Giving the mind and body rest is the key for rejuvenation/recuperation. Rest also contributes to having a healthy state of mental health because it allows you to have a clear eye view on conflicts/situations that may arise in your life. My favorite form of resting is sleeping, getting at least 6-8 hours of sleep every night is a big thing when it comes to being productive, being in a good mood, etc. Today, choose to make time for rest in your busy schedule and evaluate how it effects your day and mood. Take delight in the small victories, getting things done but also resting is a victory that should be celebrated!

Time Prioritization

Timing is everything, it’s a cliche saying that holds a lot of truth. As Americans we always say that there aren’t enough hours in a day, but the question is, how are you spending the hours that you DO have? Of course, we know that we cannot always do everything on our list(s) in a day, but we CAN get them done according to how important they are. How can you do this? I’m glad you asked! The #1 thing that has helped me get more done on a day-to-day basis is writing things down in my planner. Every Sunday I look at my calendar to see what I need to add to it for the week and I cross things off as I go. Depending on what needs to be done, I make a note on my phone calendar AND my physical planner. As a student/business owner, this has minimized the number of forgotten tasks. While you are planning things for your schedule, be sure to make time for: mental breaks, meditating, eating, self-reflecting, etc. A lot of the time, we tend to spend a lot of time of things that are not benefiting us and the things that really need to be done are on the bottom of our lists, but this only leads to destruction. Don’t let distractions dominate your day. Say it with me, don’t let distractions dominate your day. Focus on the small goals each day but also shine some light on those end goals because both the small and large goals matter. Make that list, write things down so you won’t forget, BUT make sure you take breaks in between. Prioritizing your time also eliminates burnout. Burnout is hard to come back from, so when you feel overwhelmed, step away for a moment and focus on something else for a little while. It’ll all be okay in the end, but like I have stated in the other blogs, breaking these bad habits starts with YOU. Make that decision, there’s beauty in the making, and last but not least, don’t let those distractions dominate your day! Happy HumpDay!

Vulnerability

vul·ner·a·bil·i·ty

“The quality or state of being exposed to the possibility of being attacked or harmed, either physically or emotionally.” That’s one word that society has tried to make us fearful of, but we all know that holding things in and letting them build inside of us does damage to us mentally and emotionally. As I have stated in every blog, being surrounded by trustworthy people is the one puzzle piece that cannot be left out. Talking to someone with a clear mind about hardships you’re having (instead of holding it all inside) can save you from a whirlwind of self-destruction. But I know in the back of your mind you’re thinking, “What if they don’t care? What if I’m bothering them? What if they judge me? What if they talk about me after I tell them what’s going on?” Truth be told, if you truly know the person and you feel like you can trust them AND they have proven to you that you can, those questions shouldn’t even enter your mind. No, they aren’t obligated to listen to you, but if they really love you, they won’t think twice about lending a helping hand because they want to see you be the best form of yourself. I know, I know, it’s still a big risk to take, but being vulnerable for that small amount of time can really lift the heavy burden you’ve been feeling. One thing I had to learn on my faith journey is how to be vulnerable with God. Sounds crazy, right? But it’s not. God loves to know how we really feel (even though he already knows everything), he likes to hear us speak it out of our mouths. He is always ready to listen to us because he cares so much about us! Whenever I would vent to him, he would always show me that he was listening to me by doing small gestures that made my day and that was enough for me to push on and realize that I can really trust Him. Don’t be afraid to talk about what’s going on, pray about it, it’s never too late! You + Vulnerability = Freedommmm!

Positive Environments

Along with taking care of yourself like we talked about last week, apart of that is being cautious of your surroundings. Our environments have a strong influence on us and a lot of the time, we don’t realize it. Wondering why you’re feeling drained all of the time? Where did all of that negativity and bitterness come from? That’s a red flag to check and see who you are choosing to surround yourself with. I noticed how the people around me influenced my decisions, how focused I was on my goals, and my mindset. Your environment should be one that: influences you to be/do better, allows you to be vulnerable when need be, and one that leaves you feeling full of energy. Negative environments are disguised as a distraction that’s meant for you to forget who you are, fogs your focus and vision for things in the future, and a number of other things. EVACUATE IMMEDIATELY and shift your sight back to what’s important. My best friend always tells me to focus on my focus and it always causes me to shift my sight back to what’s important. It’s a form of positive reassurance and affirmation that may seem small, but it’s coming from one of the most positive/driven people in my life, which causes me get my act together. A bond has been built with that person, which consists of me trusting them and knowing that they only have my best interest at heart is a form of a positive environment. Your real friends should be able to let you know when they see you getting off, that’s their job as your friend to help you get back to where you need to be. I’m telling you, the people around you can either help make you or they can help break you. It doesn’t matter if you’re used to being around something bad/negative, the choice is left up to you. Do you wanna see things get better? Do you wanna get back on track with your life? Do you wanna better your mental health? Make the choice to cut any ties with ANYTHING that isn’t pushing you to be a better person. Choose to love yourself enough to make those decisions that need to be made.